The joy of the chaos.
If we had a dollar for every time someone looked at us and said, "I just don't know how you all do it," we wouldn't be millionaires, but we'd be rich.
If you know us, you know we do a lot of...well, everything. Maryanna and I are both working full-time jobs that require extra hours outside the workplace. We're both master's level students. We both serve and lead in multiple areas of ministry in our church. Did I mention we have kids? Three of them. A teenager (foreign exchange student), a two-year-old (biologically ours), and an infant (currently in foster care). To top it all off, we maintain some semblance of a social life with what little time we have left. Since my wife and I were married, our lives have hardly ever been calm, and they certainly haven't been eventless. We had our son two and a half years ago, and that came with its own set of challenges. We started hosting exchange students a little less than two years ago, and we completed foster care training this past summer.
Yes, it's a lot. Do I wish I had more time? Absolutely. Do I wish there were moments when not a single one of the kids needed something? No doubt. Do I wish life wasn't so hectic? Sure. Would I change anything? Not a chance. The question we always get asked is "How?" but few people ever bother to ask "Why?" And If they do ask, it's usually with a sarcastic attitude and is accompanied by a look that implies just how crazy they think we are. Now, we are a little crazy. Today though, I just wanted to explain why.
I read two books during my time in college that drastically shaped the way I view God, myself, my sin, and how I should live my life in light of those things: The Pursuit of Holiness by Jerry Bridges and Just Do Something by Kevin DeYoung. God has used those two books to shape the way that I view everything. Much of what I learned from these two godly men is directly responsible for why we do what we do despite it being difficult, frustrating, and inconvenient. With it being a weekend where we honor orphans and widows, it didn't feel like there would be a better time to address everything we do, but more importantly, why we do it.
We aren't called to be comfortable.
If you study the Bible, you'll quickly realize when God calls his people, He never calls them to a more comfortable situation than where they started. While God promises his people a future hope and redemption, the road to redemption is never easy. God told Moses of the promised land, but not till after they grew in the wilderness. Jesus' resurrection gave humanity hope for salvation, but not till he went to the cross. All of the apostles (whose deaths have been documented) died gruesome deaths as martyrs after they accepted their calling to "go and make disciples." God never promised it would be easy. So, if they knew this would happen, why did they do it? Because they knew temporary comfort wasn't worth risking failure to fulfill God's calling on their lives. This is what Paul explains to the churches of Galatia when he says,
"I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." - Galatians 2:20 ESV
followed later by
"And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires." - Galatians 5:24
The only way to truly live for Christ is to first die to yourself. Following where God calls you always means sacrificing time, energy, and convenience for the greater cause of the Kingdom of God.
At times, our lives are overwhelmingly inconvenient but the, annoyance and discomfort aren't even close to the amount of joy gained from all that we do. We have an exchange student who becomes more curious about the things of God every day. We have a toddler who is loved and, God willing, will one day grow into a strong man willing and able to serve God's Kingdom with his life. We have a foster baby who now has a home, and hopefully, one day, he will feel as blessed to be a part of our lives as we do being a part of his.
God is a Father who welcomes and adopts orphans.
James tells us that true, acceptable religion means caring for orphans and widows.
"Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world." - James 1:27 ESV
The beautiful part about this is that God not only commands us to do it, but he models it for us. Looking back at Paul's writings to the Galatians again:
"But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, 'Abba! Father!' So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God." Galatians 4:4–7 ESV
When I think about all the people in our house, it is hard not to think about what my situation would be apart from Christ. If not for the grace of God, I would still be an orphan without a father, a sheep without a shepherd, and a sinner without a savior.
This weekend, we honor the orphans and widows, as God has called us to. But don't just do it this weekend. This scripture isn't restricted to just one weekend every year. It is for us to do daily, year-round.
Everywhere you drive, you see the signs that say "Foster Parents Needed!" They aren't joking. In Kentucky alone, there are currently just shy of 8,300 children in the foster care system. That means that over eight thousand known orphans in the commonwealth of Kentucky are searching for a permanent home. Christians love to point out the problem, but it is high time we become part of the solution. I would encourage you to pray with open hands and arms that God will use you to be a blessing to orphans, and maybe you'll be able to adopt and add a new member to your family, just as God adopted you into His. Having kids in your house who aren't your biological children is unconventional and sometimes strange. They come with baggage, and their situation is sometimes a mess. When you came to Christ, you had baggage, and your situation was certainly a mess. "But God."
If you're a Christian, God didn't call you to sit on the sidelines. You are blessed to be a blessing to others.
We recently took family photos. We had lots of good ones with our perfect poses and rays of sunshine in the background...but this one's my favorite. I wouldn't trade the smiles on these kids' faces for the world. We've been so blessed. God is so good.
So next time, before you ask "How?" take a second to ask "Why?"